Breastfeeding is quite possibly the most difficult yet simultaneously easiest thing I have ever done. Seriously.
Little Man & I are about 11 months down the road in our breastfeeding relationship. We’ve had our bumps in the road, but on the whole, things have gone well.
The secret to our success is support. Support from the mister, support from my mom, support from my co-workers, support from my lactation consultant (and her support group…lol). Well, support and the fact that I tend to research the hell out of everything and feel really secure in the decisions I make.
One thing I’ve realized during this season of breastfeeding is that HOLY CRAP people like to try to sabotage each other. Not intentionally. I really don’t think it is intentional, but it happens.
Questions & comments roll in like sneaky little storm clouds filled to the brim with judgment into almost every single conversation you have about breastfeeding.
“You’re still breastfeeding?”
“Oh, you’re going to stop at a year, right?”
“What about when he can ‘ask for it’?”
“Aren’t you ready to be done pumping/nursing?”
Yes. No. He’s been ‘asking for it’ since birth. Not really.
Why can’t people stop asking questions they don’t want the answers, too? Can’t we cut the bull shit?
I really don’t mind the questions from people that are truly interested in having an actual conversation. There really isn’t a question I won’t answer, but what I’ve found is that people have huge misconceptions about breastfeeding and that the questions they tend to ask are almost always about when you are going to wean your child.
Now, that might not seem like that big of a deal, but when you are thick in the middle of your breastfeeding relationship with your child – especially your first — you don’t necessarily want to talk about weaning.
Maybe it’s just me.
I could see how if you were the type of person that doesn’t have the most self confidence in the world or if you were worried about offending other people, all that weaning talk would get to you and make you wean your child before you were ready. (Side note – I’m all for weaning when YOU are ready, and only YOU know when YOU are ready.)
I am not one to be worried about offending people with my breastfeeding choices. I made the decision to breastfeed for as long as it is good for Little Man & me, and I’m sticking to it. However, even I get worn down with all the thoughtless questions.
I love the people that offer words of encouragement over questions.
That’s really what I need.
Don’t we all?
Why can’t we all just be cheerleaders?
Now, don’t get me wrong, if you really want to sit down & have a deep conversation with me, I’ll love it. I love deep conversation. I love sharing things I’ve learned and hearing about the things that are on other people’s minds.
But if you don’t want to have a conversation, please refrain from bullshit questions.
And if you do happen to ask bullshit questions, don’t be surprised when I give you way more information than you were asking for.
“What about when he gets teeth?”
“He already has four teeth. He’s bitten the hell out of my nipples more times than I care to remember. Yes, it hurts like a sonofabitch. No, it does not make me want to wean him.”
This could probably apply to a lot of stuff in life.